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In Operation Since September 26, 1999
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This Update As Of:
9/13/2001
(There will be no update during the week of 9/20. Next update: 9/27)
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Host Segments
Dr F and Frank have a show-length-long battle to the death
---------------------------
Complete 
Audio
File
(Coming out of Joel's invention exchange - Rainy Day Ipecac's)
[Frank] - Well, hey, I'm having the blue cheese Coke slurpy.
[Dr F] - Frank! NO! (Slaps the ipecac from Frank's hand)
[Frank] - Well, what's an ipecac, anyway?
[Dr F] - Just get this weeks invention exchange, Frank!
[Frank] - Okay, Steve.
[Dr F] - It's the essence of evil, and it's a good friend.
[Frank] - Out, Out, OUT, Out! I'm doing the invention exchange this week.
[Dr F] - I don't think so, Roy! It's my idea. I do the invention exchange.
[Dr F] - I've just about had it, Smart Boy!
[Frank] - (Pulls a knife) Oh yeah! (laughs) I'm going to cut you, man! I'm going to cut you. That's right!
[Frank] - I'm going to cut you a second smile, Daddy-O! ([Dr F] - Yeah?) Come on!
[Tom] - What in the Sam-scratch is going on down there!?
[Joel] - I don't know, but I don't like it. Not one bit!
[Dr F] - Send them the movie, Frank!
[Frank] - No way! No way! I'm looking at a dead man - A dead man!!!
[Dr F] - (Slams Frank's head down upon the console. Frank rises for a moment, then collapses to the floor)
(Joel and the Bots go and watch the first half of the film, then Frank and Dr F continue their battle)
(Frank and Dr F are battling for control of a pistol)
[Frank] - I'm going to kill you!
[Dr F] - Well, you're going to have to kill me first! I mean... D'oh.....
[Dr F] - (Gains control of the gun) Ahhhh!
[Dr F] - (Hits Frank's hand over his knee, then grabs the scissors) (Laughs)
[Dr F] - I'm taking hair, Frank!
[Frank] - (As Dr F grabs him, Frank goes into a barber shop conversation) Hey, how about them Twins, eh?
[Dr F] - Oh, I think they're going rather well.
(Dr F and Frank now grab large mallets, then take swings, hitting each other on the head)
(After a couple of blows, both of them collapse to the floor)
(Dr F and Frank rise from the floor, and now both appear to be idiots)
[Frank] - (Reading the comics) (laughing like a moron) Look, it's funny! Beatle Baily!
[Dr F] - Yeah, look. Garfield's got a red butt!
[Dr F] - (Produces a cattle prod, zapping Frank in the neck a couple of times until he falls to the floor)
[Dr F] - Oh, hello, Booby! Just a little management - labor dispute.
[Dr F] - Nothing to (taps the cattle prod into his hand) G-AHHHHHHH G-AHHHH G-AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
(Joel and the Bots return to the theatre for the remainder of the film)
(Final segment beings, and we find Frank and Dr F pretty trashed)
[Dr F] - (Sipping coffee) Mmmmm. That IS good!
[Frank] - Oh.. I'm glad I brought the orange cappuccino...
[Dr F] - Wait a minute. *I* brought the orange cappuccino! (both laugh, but it hurts)
[Dr F] - Oh, hello, Booby. Frank and I are just patching things up with a little cup-of-kindness.
[Frank] - You know, it's the quiet moments that are the most precious moments...
[Frank] - I'll make some popcorn. ([Dr F] - Mmmm) (Frank pushes the button)
(Dr F and Frank both begin to laugh. It then turns to sobs and moans of pain)
(End of segment)
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